Attitude

I, er, enhanced an image that a friend sent me of his new pet.

He appreciated it.

Random Friday Night Post: The Alpo Story

Background: I was a volunteer firefighter for 8 years. I worked out of one of the busiest stations in Maryland. I mainly worked on the ambulance, which is the setting for tonight's post.

We've been dispatched for an "unknown" medical emergency. I'm the third aide, meaning I'm sitting in the back of the ambulance. We just pulled up on location. I hop out, aide bag over my shoulder. I'm standing beside the ambulance wondering when the driver and second aide are going to get out. I start to walk towards the passenger side door of the cab when I hear a low growl over my shoulder.

I slooooooowly turned my head. There, about 8 feet away, was a medium-size, mangy, dirty, ugly dog. Does Cujo ring a bell, friends? Now I realize why the other two guys are not getting out of the ambulance.

They're too busy laughing their asses off.

I'm trying to decide what I'm going to do, whether make a jump for the back of the ambulance from whence I came? The cab so that I can kill the driver and aide before I get mauled?

Just as I'm trying to decide, I hear a crunch, crunch, crunch sound behind me as if someone were walking across gravel. I again slooooooowly turn my head a little further.

I beheld a beautiful sight; a police officer was coming up behind me, with both his flashlight beam and full attention on the dog. And his non-flashlight-holding hand was on his gun. No, not just on it, but his hand around the grip. All he had to do was pull up and the gun would be unholstered.

Fortunately, the dog was as stupid as it was ugly. He did not like the idea of tangling with two people. He finally drifted off, and I and the (expletives deleted for decency) driver and second aide went on about the business of this call.

As you're probably aware, firefighters are known for harassing each other. Mercilessly. I became immortalized thereafter (or at least until I did something else even better) as "Alpo".

And now you know the REST of the story...

Technology is overrated.

Sometimes, it's better to go with the simple answer to a particularly thorny problem.

This from a friend of mine. Five screens, three games. He and his wife were watching three NFL games simultaneously, and they both have their respective fantasy football sites up on their laptops (operating wirelessly through their access point).

This is known as serious visual overload.

(sniff... sniff) I'm so proud!