Friday, January 04, 2013

The Oatmeal vs Carreon: Where's Funnyjunk?

Yes, Charles Carreon has dropped his lawsuit. Just about the time that the popcorn is popping and you're dropping some hot butter on it (with a dash of salt), it seems like its over. Carreon dropped the lawsuit, and the legalese says that it was done "without prejudice". Keep the popcorn handy. It could flare up any moment from this time forward. In the meantime, Carreon is declaring "victory". Whatever. Here's my problem with this whole affair. Where was Funnyjunk? Was Carreon supposed to be representing them? Carreon claimed he was doing this solo. But why didn't Funnyjunk put out some type of statement saying, "Look, this batshit lawyer of ours just went rogue. He's not with us. We tried, we pleaded, nay we begged him to get back on his meds, but it didn't do any good." Instead, we got... nothing at all. I checked their website and found nothing. No word on this whole lawsuit. Nothing on anything that transpired. Why, in their world, Carreon and The Oatmeal don't exist. (Except for all of those Oatmeal images and content that golly, gee, wind up on their website.) So why the silence? Could it be that Carreon was doing exactly what FJ wanted him to do? In other words, Carreon broke all of the playground rules by instantly jumping to the legal equivalent of the "triple dog dare". Perhaps that's what FJ wanted. I submit that it is what Funnyjunk wanted. "Call us thieves, will ya?", they said. "We'll let our little pet legal poo-flinging monkey deal with you!" All they had to do was sit back and watch. They made sure and got their hands good and buttered from the popcorn, because for dessert, they're going be getting hairy palms. All of the crazy, vindictive, simply insane stuff Carreon did just got them all kinds of excited. That ticks me off even more. It wasn't enough that the turd Carreon decided to squash the First Amendment rights of multiple people. That alone had me more than a bit angry. But the people who allowed made him do it are getting off scot free. Remember: They started this. Now they think that they can claim innocence. That cannot stand. Now hear this! Boycott Funnyjunk! No, don't harass them. Don't e-mail them any threats. Just don't e-mail them at all. Do not contact them in any way. Let their page views drop to zero. Let those cockbreaths just wither on the Internet vine. I want them wondering, "Hey, where did everyone go? We have as much stolen content as before? Why aren't they looking at us?" Then maybe, just maybe, they'll crawl back under whatever rock they slithered from. And stay there.

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